Through An 'Old Timer's' Eyes
By Howard 'Mac' McDonald

Winter has its long, cold fingers wrapped around our necks and she does not want to let go. The wind whistles down the valley and the only sign of the wildlife is an occasional track in the snow. Most of the cars you see look like a salt block with wheels.

Despite all the hardships of winter, I still think we have the best weather in the country. My appointment with the shrink is next week.

In our humble abode, the wood-burning fireplace in the living room gives off a warm, romantic glow. The other bright spot is in the kitchen. My wife always has a pot of something bubbling away. If you look in the oven you might see a nice pot roast with carrots, onions and potatoes. The heat from the oven helps warm the house.

In my lifetime I have seen a lot of improvements in the things that we use every day.

Winter clothing has moved from the days of the caveman into the 21st Century. Boots are lighter and warmer and the rest of the clothing is 10 times warmer than our old gear. I credit this to the people who design the cold weather gear for the military.

The old coffee percolator was always hit or miss, either too weak or too strong. Restaurant coffee from the old stainless steel urns was okay for the first few cups, but after that you could use it to take paint off a battleship. Today, coffee tastes great.

Auto racing has brought about a drastic change in the quality of tires on the family car. On the old jalopy that I drove, you were lucky to get 10,000 miles out of a set of tires.

Seatbelts, airbags, and anti-lock brakes have made vehicles a lot safer. I have been in two accidents where my seatbelt saved me. One was a head-on and the other was a rollover. I hope that I don't have to test any more safety gear.

I do not think the law should require seatbelt usage. I don't like Big Brother telling me what to do in my car. I don't like to be told to do it. As adults, we should be smart enough to know that we should wear our seatbelts.

As we trudge down the hazardous road in life, we would like to make a few decisions on our own. I would not get on a motorcycle without a helmet. It used to be the law, but now it is your decision. I think the same thing should apply to seatbelts.

Last Sunday, we took a ride to Benton to visit my brother. The steep cliffs on the side of the road had some of the most magnificent ice formations I have ever seen. When the sun glistened on them, they looked like they were electrified and the prisms flashed like a diamond.

My brother's daughter brought out an old family picture album. We had a lot of laughs and these old pictures brought back a lot of memories. When they were young, my mother and father were a handsome couple. I wonder why some of their good looks didn't rub off on me?

On the way home, about five miles northeast of Hughesville, about 300 yards off the road was a full-blown teepee. It was right on the edge of a patch of woods and smoke was curling from its top. The traffic prevented me from stopping, but the next time I go that way I will investigate.

My wife is reading a novel, "Want To See My Attic?" The title made me think of the attic we had in our old house.

When I was a little boy, I was always curious about what was up there. To keep me out, my mom always said, "You better stay out of the attic; Old Bloody Eyes lives up there."

By the time I was a teenager, Old Bloody Eyes was not a nemesis, so I would venture to the attic to snoop around. One day I found this small trunk that belonged to my mother when she was a teenager. With my trusty Barlow pocket, I picked the lock. I was disappointed that I did not find an old pocketbook filled with money.

What I did find was an old newspaper from 1918. A cartoon in it featured Mutt and Jeff. They were standing by this German pill box and Mutt hollered down to the Germans, "How many of you Heinies down there?"

The German replied, "Thirteen."

Jeff threw a hand grenade in and said, "Divide this among you."

The cartoonists couldn't get away with that today.

Wear your seat belt, be politically correct and maybe you won't get in trouble. Remember: Big Brother is watching.