Through An 'Old Timer's' Eyes
By Howard 'Mac' McDonald

On Independence Day, while my wife and I were having breakfast, I spotted a man to whom I owed a big thank you. His name is Joe Yore from Palmdale, Calif., and you will be hearing more about him because he has a big plan for Emporium.

Last fall, Joe invited all veterans of the VFW and American Legion to have dinner at the Cabin. About 40 veterans attended and Joe picked up the tab for the whole smear.

He used to live on East Second Street and every year he comes to Emporium and spends a week visiting old friends. When Joe got out of the Marine Corps, he stayed in California to seek fame and fortune.

He has been involved in television and the movies. If you have ever been in the middle dining room at the Cabin Kitchen, you have probably seen all the pictures and awards he has accumulated over the years. There are some very important people on that wall. I call it the Joe Yore Wall of Fame.

During this year's visit, Joe bought the Summerson property next to the Cabin Kitchen parking lot. This property is the future home of the Cameron County Veterans Museum. Joe is a very patriotic American who believes our local veterans should have a place to display their medals and artifacts collected during their time in the service.

I have volunteered to help him get this project started. There are a lot of things that have to be done so that the building will be people-friendly. I will be counting on my fellow veterans for their support.

My horoscope for Monday said it was a good day to make new discoveries about myself and the world around me. I guess that was pretty close to what happened to me today. My one discovery was that I noticed my fly was open and I wondered how long that had been the case.

I guess that if you believe your horoscope then you are probably a little superstitious.

Some folks won't go out of the house on Friday the 13th. If a black cat crosses the road in front of them, they will turn around and go the other way.

My mother always said that if you laid your hat on the table or the bed, you'd have bad luck. To this day I will not put my hat on the table or the bed. I am not very superstitious, but my mother was right about too many things for me to ignore that advice.

So far the punkies have not taken over the back porch and when the sun goes down it is pretty pleasant to sit out and listen to all the grass nuts mowing their lawns. Ah, the sounds of summer.

When I was a kid, my dad was the justice of the peace and everyone called him Squire. I can remember my mother saying to him, "Squire, the grass needs cut." His reply was always, "Maggie, I didn't plant it so I am not going to cut it." Guess who got the job? That old reel mower was like pushing a dump truck with all the tires flat.

Dumb questions always amaze me, like when you are pushing the lawn mower and some one asks, "What you doing, cutting the grass?"

A man was in line at the store with a bag of Purina dog food when the lady behind him asked, "Do you have a dog?"

He felt like saying, "No, I have an elephant," but not wanting to be rude, he explained that he himself was on a Purina dog food diet and he had lost 20 pounds before he went to the hospital.

She asked, "Did you get poisoned on the dog food?"

"No," he replied. "I was trying to romance this female Irish setter and she ran out into the street and we both got hit with a car."