Through An Old Timer's Eyes

The Grim Reaper has really reduced the number of celebrities, starting last week with Ed McMahon and then Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson.

That was so newsworthy that Fox News actually stopped hacking away at President Obama for a few hours so the correspondents could blab about the passing celebrities. Johnny Carson's sidekick never did get me my Publishers Clearinghouse check.

I was thinking back to when Shirley Temple, who became Shirley Temple Black, was the sweetheart little girl dancing on movie screens all over the country. I hope she has had smooth sailing on the Good Ship Lollipop.

My wife is named after her and I will never forget what my mother told her on our wedding day: "Shirley, if you live with him for one year, you will have earned your place in heaven."

After 59 years, there is no doubt where Shirley is going. It's hell to have a reputation that even your own mother condemns.

The weather has been a big topic at Liars Corner. One day they say it's too hot and humid and we don't have enough rain to make the gardens grow. Then we get a deluge and there's too much rain. I figured out a long time ago that I can't do anything about the weather. In fact, I found out a long time ago that I can't do much about anything.

If I was paid for peddling influence, I would have a very light paycheck. They say ignorance is bliss, so how come I am not laughing all the time?

John Denver sang, "Sunshine on my shoulders makes me happy." That sure worked for me last Saturday. There was brilliant sunshine and I was happy all day long. I was even happy while I was weed-whacking.

They say that the older you get, the dumber you get, but I learned one thing today: don't whack weeds with your shorts on. My old skinny legs have the proof right on them. They look like I was in a kicking battle with a bobcat. Oh well, I can always buy some of that cream the ladies use to get rid of stretch marks and scars.

I walked into the Cabin Kitchen today wearing shorts and one smart mouth said I had legs like a bird. I corrected him and told him I have legs like a canary and that's why I could sing so pretty. He didn't think that was funny.

Our part of the state must be the yard sale capital of the world. Do you know the difference between a yard sale and an estate sale? A yard sale is where you put all the things that are in your way and you're trying to get rid of it. Some of it is junk and some of it is good stuff. Most people put price tags on the stuff and usually you can haggle for a lower price. I go to yard sales looking for tools while my wife goes for the thrill of seeing what people are getting rid of. I usually come home empty-handed but she will have something.

Estate sales are run as same as a yard sale but everything is for sale. The best way to have an estate sale is to get an auctioneer to come in and run the whole show. He takes a commission but he also makes sure the sale is well publicized and takes care of any leftovers. In the long run, he will get you more money than if you did it all yourself.

After much work and preparation, the Cameron County Veterans Museum is set to open on Fourth Street in Emporium. Joe Yore and Estelle are rolling in from Palmdale, Calif., to do the honors. There are some very interesting things to see and you will be amazed at some of them.

Just to make one thing clear, this museum is not in competition with the Little Museum operated by the Cameron County Historical Society at the old schoolhouse in Sterling Run. It is dedicated to the veterans of this area. I am sure you will like Joe Yore's presentation of the artifacts and he is open for anything veterans would like to donate to improve the museum.

I hope there is a good turnout. Things like this don't happen too often in a small town.